Here is everything I've eaten in pain staking detail for the last 7 days!!!

Suckah Please!!!
Ain't nobody got time for that!

I started Paleo Officially on Monday and as of right now (Thursday evening) - So Far So Good...
I'm dropping weight slowly but surely and the Caffeine Withdrawals have finally subsided.
Thanks for the support.
Let me reward you with some comedy...

I was sitting in my Sweltering Hot House waiting for the AC repairman to fix my AC unit.
When a random text from a random phone number came in.
Not one to ever miss a chance to have some fun with a strangers here is that conversation.  It takes a turn I probably should have seen coming...

ENOY!

Beefy Green Roll-ups!

I had a solid day on calories, protein & carbs. I am targeting 2000 calories, 200g of protein and 20g of carbs. I hadn't actually noticed how nicely that lined up until just now. Eggs, bacon and protein drink for breakfast. Roasted chicken for lunch from a little place named (appropriately) Chicken Express.

 

If you happen to live in the SLC area it's worth checking out. they have several low-carb options including whole roasted chicken (duh) gyros, beef/lamb/chicken kebabs, pork ribs (unsauced, but rubbed) and of course salad.

 

Dinner was very good, I tried something called a Flat Out light bread wrap. I grilled the wrap and then made a roast beef wrap with pepper jack, roast beef, mayo, mustard and a leafy greens and herb mix from walmart that had bits of dill, chive, chervil, parsley etc. the wrap was good and I think the Flat Out wraps will be a very nice occasional garlic bread, pizza crust or maybe even a sugar free cinnamon-sugar toast. The flavor was pretty good for low-carb bread (7g), defintely a keeper.

 

Afterward I realized the 1/2 C. of greens wasn't enough to meet me unspecified internal target so I made what I will call Beefy Green Roll-Ups. As you can see I placed a scant teaspoon of mayo (although I recorded a full tsp) on a slice of roast beef and added a 1/2 slice of pepper jack and several banana pepper rings, then rolled that up with another 1/2 C. of greens.

 

Three roll-ups ended up consuming closer to 2.5 C. than 1.5 C., but whatever, greens have virtually no calories and plenty of vitamins. I'll take the lousy extra gram of carbs.

 

If I can get fat on arugula and red leaf lettuce I may as well stop trying and just turn to a 100% garlic bread and cheesecake diet (I know! They sound amazing together right?? Try it as a sandwich... you're welcome!)

 

Before adding the greens: 

 After rolling it all together:

 The calorie/carb/protein etc. counts for one Beefy Green Roll-Up

 

I am of course also including my daily food journal. If anyone has some favorite low carb snacks, please share them in the comments! I currently am using chicharrones  (pork cracklings not rinds though, those are like unflavored puffed cheetos) and roasted seaweed (very tasty if you haven't tried it!) I was making crispy kale a while back and I will probably start doing that again, as well as home made beef jerky. I am thinking the beefy green roll-ups will be nice if I am at home, or have a little more time to prepare in the morning.

Update: After noting that pork rinds are essentially unflavored puffed cheetos I recalled that I bought several canisters of Kraft Cheese powder (think a seasoning shaker with the stuff that comes in Kraft Mac & Cheese). I just thought that I'd share that for the low, low price of 1g carbs I made those pork rinds tasty! And so healthy too =)

Inadvertent jabs cut most deeply

So today was pretty great, but I did have a kind of unfortunate memory. At work there was an email that I receive every month about company policy updates. I generally scan through them since most of it applies to the clinical folks and not software folks, but this caught my eye since it mentioned the dress policy.

 

My memory was sparked by the mention that outerwear, with the company logo, given out in the past was no longer allowed in the clinical setting. This reminded me of a very nice Cutter & Buck parka in pristine condition that hangs in the back of my closet.

 

Shortly after I became a manager I received an email about a management retreat. With the email was a request to respond with some information including jacket size from a list of options that went all the way up to 1X (technically a size larger than X-Large for you little folks out there). I replied simply that they needn't include me in that, but my boss's boss's boss was A) very thoughtful and B) kind of a big guy himself (I assume they included 1X because that was his size.

 

At the end of the retreat, this man called everyone up individually to give them a personalized jacket with the logo and shake hands and thank them for their efforts. I did not expect my name, but sure enough at the very end he got to 'Z' and called me up. I wasn't sure if he knew there wasn't a jacket so I hesitated a moment to give him a chance to discover for himself that there was no jacket, but to my surprise he reached into the box and pulled a jacket a bit different than the others. The others had been simple wind breakers but this was a kind of high-end jacket and was visibly a little different.

 

When I got up there he leaned in and said in a low voice, "I figured you didn't provide a size because you needed one a little bigger, don't worry, this one is plenty big." A thoughtful gesture from a man who clearly cared enough to take the time to ascertain my situation, correctly guess my dilemma and solve the problem.

 

I never did tell him, that when he sat down to decide just how big I really was, and went with, "plenty big" he had chosen a jacket that was two sizes to small. I even wore it a couple of times to work even though the sides were six inches apart when the material was stretched to its limit. It really is a nice jacket, and who knows? Maybe I will get to wear it someday soon.

Leafy Greens and Pork Rinds, mmmmm!

Today went pretty well! I started off by losing another pound, making it 14 to date. Breakfast was a protein drink, lunch was a salad and dinner was sauteed arugula with diced bacon, a pork chop and three fried eggs.

I accomplished one of my goals for the day which was to eat more greens. I also kept my net carbs down to 20.5 (myfitnesspal rounds up and eggs have a 1/2 g of carbs each) That is 1/2 a carb over, but what are you going to do?

I have included a picture of my food journal for the day. Goal for tomorrow is to eat less pork rinds. They are zero carb, but I'd prefer to be eating something less salty and perhaps more substantial. I do like sunflower seeds, I might try those for snacking tomorrow.

The next couple of days will be tough since Tomorrow is our anniversary and Friday and Saturday will all be about Irene's graduation which means I will probably be eating out a lot.

More pictures... Fewer words...

Yo... GDPIII here.
My first post was "wordy"...
So I will change it up and post a few pics and this will be an entry of few words or fewer words...

This is the Diet that appeals most to me.
So I polled the friends who are doing it.
This was the Book that most people recommended.

My own online research lead me to this book.

It is more of a cook book and shopping tips.

So far it has been a handy companion to the first book.

I have been drinking a lot of Pepsi.
I quit on Sunday 07/07/2013.

Today (Tues) I woke up with a Withdrawal Headache. 

All we are as humans, is bags of water & electricity.
A major component of every diet is lots of water.

One of these bottles is a Quart. I try to drink 6 - 8 a day.

This is my commercial heavy duty scale.

It was given to me by a friend in the Medical field. 

My scale stays on and in position at all times.

I literally have to step over it to get in or out of my Bathroom. 

My awesome scale goes up to 2,000lbs.

It is calibrated to be accurate within .01lbs 

I have a long way to go just to get back to where I was even a year ago.

But I've never been afraid of doing the work...

Facts are stubborn things.

I don't know about the rest of you but I really enjoyed reading Geoff's post. He's a funny guy. However he sometimes gets it dead wrong.

I wrote that I did weigh 18 lbs. As of this morning, I have now lost 14 pounds and am therefore weighing in at a solid 504 pounds.

I believe you've got some catching up to do Geoff. Not that it's a competition, but if it was, I'd totally be winnning.

In honor of our journey togather I'd like to share this visual image of Geoff and I beginning a journey together. As you can clearly see, I am the little fellow on the right.

Please let me introduce myself...

Hello. I am GDPIII.

I love Stand up Comedy. I would say I love blogging but as you are about to find out in the worst way. I am not a writer. Sure I can come up with funny stuff and sometimes even tug at the heart strings a little.  However, what I bring to the table in wit and charm.  I lack in spelling and grammar.  You are probably wondering 3 things right now.

1. Why did I start like that?

2. When am I actually going to start?

3. Why have you read this far and more importantly why should you read any further?

Let me knock these out in order...

#1 - The one thing Stand up comedy and Blogging have in common; Is that there is no easy way to start. There are cheesy and disingenuous ways (Hello Chicago, who is ready to have a good time tonight!).

However, its always Awkward and little clumsy (not unlike my honeymoon...)

#2 - I am so skilled at being awkward and a little clumsy. That you hadn't even realized I already started! (not unlike my honeymoon) If you think about it.  I have already introduced you to things I like and things I love. As well as admitted some flaws and set some expectations.  Then I capped it off with some self deprecating humor.
#3 - I think this 2-part question has already worked itself out. You didn't make to here if you weren't entertained or at least intrigued thus far. You would have stopped reading already. So I'll assume we are buckled in and ready to ride until the wheels fall off.

- Last Wednesday I turned 39 years old.  I only say that so we establish right off the bat that Zach, co contributor to this Blog is indeed Older than me. (He turns 40 in 5 months)

- Today I weighed myself and I was 507lbs.  I only say THAT so we can establish that Zach also weighs more than I do. (He weighed aprox 517lbs last time he checked.)

- So now you know that I am the younger, better looking one.  I am also the single one.  So that is a happy coincidence.  

Here are some other things I currently am that Zach is not; Divorced, Depressed and Unemployed.  

These sound grim. They are not.  They are temporary situations. They are things we encounter in life and we figure out how to overcome them.  The grim part is that I was tested during these trials and I failed or am still failing.  When my wife of 14 years and I separated 1 year and 1 day ago (July 7th 2012).  I weighed 422lbs.  It was only a couple months after we separated. When we were sure reconciliation was not possible. It had become clear it was not in the best interest of ourselves or more importantly our 3 children.

If I was a betting man, I would say that this was when the depression really started to kick in. It can be tricky and downright impossible to trace that back to an exact moment.  Unless you have only had one trial in your life happen at a time.  I don't know anyone like that.  Everybody is going through something, usually several somethings of varying degrees.

On Nov. 15th, 4 months after my separation, 2 months after the Divorce process had begun.  I was laid off from the job I had been at for 5+ years.  It was out of the blue and a week before we entered into the holiday gauntlet known as Thanksgiving/ Christmas/ New years. The timing was less than ideal.

Fast forward, for now, to today. Monday July 8th 2013.  In what has been a long and arduous 12 months.  I have gained 85lbs.  Now if you consider that my Exwife weighed 115lbs.  Then the combined total weight in my bed at night is still down -30lbs.  Silver lining people if you look hard enough you'll find it.

How does one person gain 85lbs in just a year?
Well, divide that 85lbs by 12 months and we are talking about just a hair over 7lbs. a month.
You see many of us, maybe most of us, have gained 7lbs in a month before.
The difference here is I was more committed and consistent than any of you. Month after Month after Month...
  

If you break that down even further;
- You will find that 7lbs divided by 4.34 weeks in a month = just over 1.6lbs a week.
- Divide that 1.6lbs a week by 7 days = .23lbs a day.

That is less than a 1/4lbs a day gained over the last year.
(Which both sounds like a lot and not very much all at the same time. Math is hard you guys...)

So for the last year:
I responded to; stress, change, insecurity, depression, anger, hurt, fear etc...
by eating 1/4lbs more of food than I was burning off each day... Crazy right?

If I'm being honest...
That was probably 60% - 70%  Calories from Pepsi alone.
(Lots more about my life long love affair with Pepsi to come in the near future)
I had stopped drinking Pepsi in an effort to lose weight back in late 2010 - 2012.
- In this tumultuous time. I consciously turned to my old friend and crutch to get me through the long days and even longer nights.
- I cannot tell you how much of this "Sweet Brown Heaven" I was putting away everyday.
I can tell you that I didn't miss a day (until I quit on 07/07/2013).

So that in a nutshell is who I am.  I will end this for now.  I promise to return again soon and regularly to share more of my past and talk more about what the future holds for me.

I am an open person, an open wound and an open book.  You may ask me anything. I find healing in writing, sharing and community.  So join in or just follow along. It's your choice. Feel free to leave a comment or ask any question you want. I promise to answer it as funny and honestly as I can.

Geoffrey Dale Pierce III -
*** Here after known as GDPIII -***